Saturday 27 August 2016

Why Working With Cancer Patients Is Not Depressing

"This pathetic?" This is the first question I asked, which tells me that many people do not realize how clarifying and transformational may experience cancer. After working with cancer for 20 years and has had his own, I understand what others don't ..-- that cancer is shocking, heartbreaking, painful and sometimes fatal. But there is much more to the story, and as a psychotherapist, I am in the front line watch instantly open, improve and heal, regardless of whether the patients live or die.

The story begins with someone in a sea of turbulence, stripped of security and familiarity, looking for a bearing and hope. There is a closeness in time there is no room for disguises, formality, unnecessary worries. Meet someone in a raw state this, I believe, mobilizing the best of myself to help. The room is filled with the preciousness of life and the inevitability that we all die. The conversation ranged between the two kingdoms. Concern that present urgent and important: how can I protect my children? How to stop night terrors? How do I know if I choose the best treatment? What if I can't?

As human beings they are conditioned to avoid the unpleasant, and often do not change and grow until we have to. It make therapy move "not in crisis" the client is slow. Not so with cancer patients who are bombarded with the physical pain and emotional discomfort, and when the veil between the living and dead has been removed. The strength of accelerated growth and change cancer, many are afraid and don't like in the beginning.

cancer patients leads to the topic of therapy which is very important; the subject of a larger image; the problem of the soul. what aspect of my life is no longer important? Where You want to put my energy? Such as reports and projects which is more significant to me? What is the legacy I want to leave my children if I die, or even if I don't? physical pain and emotional giving them the opportunity to grow courage and strength beyond what they have known. Fatigue offers them the opportunity to slow down and notice their environment in a new way and also how to distinguish where to put their energy limited. Fear of death gives them a reason to clarify priorities and bring the party to life themselves that they are sleeping.

In 1996, one of my first client is a "Mark," a police officer of 23 years with lung cancer stage IV. He is "hard." A month before his death he lay in bed, struggling to breathe, and I visited him at his home. He wanted to talk about the squirrel that has been hanging outside the window. With tears in his eyes, he told me it's amazing how these creatures are and how much time spent watching. He told me that before the diagnosis, he would never admit the beauty of the squirrel. It's not sadness, but access to his deep love for life. I do not exaggerate when I say that he felt a sort of rapture, drowned in gratitude. I was so touched, and 20 years later I am still grateful that he shows how we can live even in the most tragic.

As a brand, for many cancerpatients there comes a time, if You live or die, when they find the space to respond to the cancer rather than react especially to it; When they have it than they should. What does it mean? This means that even if You are facing and still facing the fear, grief and sorrow, that remain open to life itself, and a way of life that it is hard to have to give them. It is to be opened, leaning in, saying yes to the extraordinary difficulties, not every day, but overall, that is a recipe for extraordinary transformation. This is the best job I've ever seen in person. And gifts for people who have to brave this trip worth it: the clarity of Priorities, the affection deeper, stronger relationships. Not too sad, yeah?



People without cancer or impending death, has admitted the crisis of power as transformative. Stephen Levine wrote a book years Live, which offers people the opportunity to intentionally and systematically handle the next year as if it were the last. my supervisor in 1996 ran the groups based on this concept and has made big changes to his life. The end of this year he shone, clear, grounded, present so she hasn't been before. A year later, and 'he died in a car accident during the trip, and if he's only 60, I feel somehow a sense of peace about it; He lives his life is better with two legs. In another example, the owner of the popular yoga studios have a coffin and is located in every day to remind himself, instinctively, precious life. The bottom line is, the more difficult to find the best treasure of life without the distraction of a terrible crisis.

0 yorum:

Post a Comment